There is a man I agree with on nearly all his views and values. Right after my hostage situation in 1996 however, he said something I strongly rejected and still do. He said one of the unfortunate things about experiencing a violent crime like I had just gone through was that I was now a victim and would be for the rest of my life. I told him, “No, I’m not.” I understood what he was trying to say, but I am not a victim now, wasn’t then, and never will be. I might be experienced, but I’m not a victim. If I die tomorrow defending myself or others, I will not die “the victim.” I am not defined by what others do to me.
In 2022 I was a speaker at an event where I met a man who had come to hear my presentation. We talked a little while; he thanked me for doing what I do, and I asked about him. He told me about the team he leads then told me he was disabled.
Please don’t misunderstand me, I have tons of respect for all who gave in their service to the point of experiencing life-changing injury. But why would you so quickly label yourself as “disabled?” Just because it’s part of your story, and a part you’re not ashamed of (as you shouldn’t be), doesn’t mean a new acquaintance of 2 minutes long should walk away from that first meeting with you having that label fixed over your head.
It was so distinct with him that I don’t even recall his name or where he was from. The only memory I can place with him is “disabled.”
Think About it
Tough things happen in our lives. While death may have no sting, it sure hurts. But even after an unfair death, the time comes to move on.
After 7 days of pleading in agony for his son’s life, King David’s little boy died anyway.
“Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped. Then he went to his own house, and at his request they served him food, and he ate.”[i]
Don’t prepare to be a victim. Prepare to be a victor.
[i] 2 Samuel 12:20 (NIV)
Comments